Somebody recently asked me what I thought was the secret ingredient to a good lover. I was searching for some magic trick or talent that sets good lovers apart from the bad when I realized, the best lover I ever had didn’t have any fancy tricks up his sleeve, he simply appreciated the fine art of foreplay. Oftentimes we get so excited and swept away when we know we’re about to get some that we just go right for the gold. Now I’m not saying that there isn’t a time and a place for a good quickie, but rather that we should invest the time into foreplay when and where we have the opportunity and willpower. Taking the time and delaying the pleasure even by a few minutes can dramatically intensify and improve your sexual encounter.
I’ve often heard people joke about not believing in foreplay and ask only half-kiddingly what the point is. What’s in it for me you ask? Plenty! The more you please your partner the more into the sex they will be, and the more likely they are to want to reciprocate. Plus, it’s exciting and satisfying to know that you can drive your partner mad with lust. It’s always nice to feel wanted, and trust me after a healthy dose of foreplay; you’ll have your partner begging you to get down.
There’s also the obvious advantage that ensures that you are both physically ready for sex. For women this is crucial, because it means that she will be wetter and lubrication in the genitals means more pleasure for the woman and a more enjoyable ride for her partner.
Urgent hurried sex can be a lot of fun, but you do lose a lot in the mix. Slowly seducing your partner allows you to try different techniques, apply different intensities and explore less obvious erogenous zones. Try touching, licking, kissing, and sucking your partner all over and watch their reactions to discover their unique turn-ons. If you hear a little gasp or moan or notice their breathing getting heavier, chances are you’re on the right track. Knowing how to push each others buttons will increase pleasure and also allow you to get to know each other more intimately.
Work slowly towards the actual sex. Leave their genitals for last, but tease them by lavishing attention on their stomachs and thighs. Let them know the sex is coming, but delay it until you both can’t stand it anymore then give in and treat your sex to wild sex. This naughty girl assures you … anticipation is a potent aphrodisiac.
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